|
| what happens when the world goes to shit and there's no love or compassion left? what happens when the few good people in this world are finally tempted to the limit? what happens when you don't have any other way out and you feel trapped and confused and everything you try to do just makes the situation worse? and better yet, what happens when the guy that everyone sees as the perfect guy...the role model for other guys to follow and act...what happens when he screws up? do people just hate him forever, even though he knows he made a bad choice and feels horrible about the way it affected those closest to him? do those closest to him give up on him and just hate him? i'm not sure what possessed me to do that, but it wasn't the right thing to do... i guess when people get hurt enough, they never quite fully recover from it, even if they forgive those who hurt them. even if they try with all their will power to forget it and make things work...it's never really the same...and what happens when you realize that things won't ever work again and you don't feel the same? what happens when you realize that you've been leading yourself on and what you thought was there, wasn't really there anymore? do you just back out and leave everyone else hanging? no, you can't. you try with what ways you can to find a suitable solution. and what happens when there is no solution? what do you do? you panic. it's human nature. we don't know what else to do! and more likely than not, our reaction brings results that didn't turn out exactly how you want them... i guess what i'm trying to say is that people make mistakes... they do things they can't reverse... but do we regret our mistakes? no! we learn from what we did. without mistakes, there would be no learning! everyone makes mistakes and nobody is perfect, no matter how hard they try...
...and what happens when your actions made when you panic hurts someone? do you just leave them there to pick up the pieces? no... can you pick the pieces up for them? no... the only thing you can do is offer support for them...
britaini i haven't left you... i couldn't leave you alone, it wouldn't be me. do i still love you? of course, i'll always love you. do i think we'll ever be together again? probably not... we just don't have that same... "thing" that we had such a long time ago... our time together came...and now it's gone... and i'm sorry for all the hurt and pain i've caused you and all the hurt and pain i AM causing you... hopefully we can still be friends and hopefully we can move on without anymore pain...
~Johnny \\//
PS by the way, i'm not going to try and hide it anymore...i'm so nervous about how people are going to react...i'm bisexual...there, i did it! if you want to hate me for it, then fine...but i'm still the same person... | | |
| hey people it's been awhile!!! just been chillin out at myspace! lol i just think it's easier though but whatever! wow lot has happened!! i can't swim any meets for like 3 weeks either cuz i failed computer science with a 67... but so far out of our umpteen grades already in that class i have about a 92 in that class so...idk what to write...today is my one month anniversary...i think i'm going to a movie...elizabethtown...heard it was good...britaini's birthday is in three days...still haven't gotten a present...tsk tsk...i'll get something though...harry potter 4 is in like 5 days...of course i'm going to see it...hypnotize comes out in like 9 days...of course i'm going to get it...wayne's birthday is also in 9 days...wayne n brit are both going to be 16...i still have 2.5 months......that's ok anna has like 6 months haha!! i love you to death still anna (in a non-lezboish way!! lol clara!) and my dad's birthday is in like two weeks or something...the 30th. he's going to be 46 years old... ...lol jk!! and i'm also getting my permit in like a week or two or something...i have to go get a VOE soon and go to the office...i have the paper things filled out or whatever though...idk!! i saw clements play katy high school in the playoffs...katy won of course! 48 - 0 they won!!! i was like   lol! dulles boys swimming was ranked number one in the district at the fort bend classic meet & number two in the region!!! i was on the JV 200 free relay team too (only the B team but whatever) but then yesterday clements beat us but whatever we're still better! lol i saw a dulles swimming shirt from like three years ago it was hilarious!! on the back in big bold letters it said:
WE RULE.
YOU DON'T
THE END.
lol well i guess i'm going to go now so leave some love and ttyl homies!! PEACE!!
~Johnny \\// | | |
| the sole purpose of this next entry is only so that people can leave the love and comment me!!! lol i know there's at least one person who's up for the challenge...*cough* kimber *cough* lol!! well everyone else should leave props and comments too so...go!
~Johnny | | |
| hey people, went to work today to clean the pool, and guess what??? it was so filthy!! there were so many leaves in that pool it wasn't even funny! we filled up like 3 bags of trash easy!! and these aren't your regular house can bags, these are the mondo industrial sized ones!! i was at the bootom of the pool cleaning it for hours upon hours, and all the pressure gave me a huge headache so i got sick and i had to go home earlier than everyone else. i feel a little better now though, so it's all good. OOH!! today i went to the movies with my brother and my dad and we saw the exorcism of emily rose. now i'm all like...where's a bible, i want to pray! lol!! well i found out yesterday that we don't have school again until wednesday, so i have another free day tomorrow!! it's kinda cool but at the same time i'm like no! cuz i think i'm failing algebra 2 and the six weeks ends the day we go back. i really can't afford to fail anything anymore...but i'll be okay though! i have no idea what to do tomorrow, any ideas?? leave the love, people (prefferably the girls only. i don't find it fun to get lovin from guys lol) oh btw check out my myspace!! lol here's a link to it:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=29176833&Mytoken=D6770E5F-D226-46B7-BF5B6FE7926D64DB1225487703
ummm...sure, just click it! PEACE!
~Johnny | | |
|
